But I’m not going to pile in when it actually gets something right. Because, to my astonishment, it just has.
Striking a trade deal with India after years of tough negotiations is a big win for Prime Minister Keir Starmer. And for Britain.
There, I said it.
While I’m being generous, he’s also handled the Ukraine crisis reasonably well and, so far, done a decent job of managing Donald Trump.
So that’s three things.
I’ve spent the last 10 months banging on about everything Labour’s got wrong. The negatives vastly outweigh those three fragile positives.
But critics of the India deal have got it wrong. Striking a trade deal with the world’s fourth-largest economy is exactly what a British PM should be doing.
It’s a tangible Brexit win and makes it even harder to rejoin the EU. Isn’t that what Brexiteers have been craving – and Remoaners dreading?
It was former PM Boris Johnson who kicked off these talks, and the Tories should be thrilled Starmer got them over the line.
Tory leader Kemi Badenoch has to oppose whatever Labour does – it’s her job, after all – but hopefully she’ll move on.
Some readers will be worried about immigration, and I totally get that. Labour has to get a grip on our broken immigration system.
But this deal isn’t about immigration.
As arch-Brexiteer Daniel Hannan pointed out in the Telegraph, it’s a trade deal not an immigration stitch-up.
“All the stories about Indian students being allowed to stay longer, or easier family reunification, or more visas, are sheer nonsense,” he writes.
All the deal does is make it easier to issue a limited number of short-term business visas, with no right to settle.
Yes, many have overstayed visas in the past, but they’re typically students or tourists. Neither are covered by this deal.
There’s also been a huge fuss about so-called two-tier taxation, with Indian workers over here exempt from paying National Insurance (NI).
There’s nothing special or scandalous about that. It’s a bog-standard double taxation treaty mechanism. We have similar deals with dozens of countries.
It applies to workers who won’t be here long enough to claim benefits or a state pension, so they don’t need to pay for them. Instead, they’ll carry on paying NI in India, where they’ll return after three years. It simply stops them paying NI twice.
There’s plenty to worry about with immigration. This deal isn’t one of them.
And it brings a ton of benefits.
It will slash tariffs on a host of UK exports, giving a major boost to big British exporters like Jaguar, JCB and Tetley.
Sales of British gin and whisky, aerospace and electrical goods, medical devices, cosmetics, lamb, salmon, chocolates, biscuits and luxury cars should all benefit. It also opens up India’s vast financial services sector.
In return, we get cheaper textiles, footwear and frozen prawns.
It’s also one in the eye for the left. They can’t stop banging on about the iniquity of the British Empire.
We ruled India for 350 years and they seem to have got over it.
The fact we beat the EU to a deal is also funny. Weren’t we supposed to be “nimble” under Brexit? Well, now we are.
Free trade is our thing. It’s under threat from Donald Trump, but even Labour isl backing it.
So instead of slamming Starmer, let’s celebrate a rare success for the PM. By cracking open some frozen prawns.