David Rathband in his police uniform (Image: AFP/Getty Images)
The day his twin brother took his own life will forever be seared into the memory of Darren Rathband.
“I was at work,” he says. “I remember I had two files in my hand and my phone went. A supervisor came on the line and said, ‘Darren, I’m sorry to tell you, David’s hung himself. He’s dead’. So that was that. I dropped the files on the floor and then wailed – in an office with about 15 people. Wailed like a baby and crawled under a desk. I remember that quite vividly, actually. I just wailed. Wailed.”
This was on February 29, 2012 and 18 months earlier David, then a police officer, had been sitting in his patrol car on a bridge over the A1 in Newcastle when he was shot twice with a sawn-off shotgun and permanently blinded by the vicious killer Raoul Moat. This dangerous criminal was on the run. He was the subject of a massive manhunt across the North East, having already seriously injured his former girlfriend Samantha Stobbart and killed her new partner Chris Brown a day after that his release from Durham Prison.
Haunted by traumatic memories of the attack, unable to come to terms with his blindness and in continual agony because of the hundreds of pieces of shrapnel still lodged in his face, David was driven to kill himself at the age of 44.
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Moat’s case grabbed headlines around the world. While on the run, he had sent a disturbing 49-page letter to the police, blaming them for all his woes and announcing he was waging war against them. The manhunt went on for almost a week. It was the biggest in modern British history, encompassing 160 armed officers, many brought in from other police forces.
The pursuit finally ended when, after six hours of failed negotiation at an armed stand-off in Rothbury, Northumberland, 30 miles north of Newcastle, 37-year-old Moat killed himself with his own gun at 2.20am on July 10, 2010. Fifteen years on, his heinous behaviour still has the power to shock.
After David’s death, Darren, who always looked up to his big brother, born two-and-a-half minutes before him, was determined to keep his twin’s memory alive. A strong advocate for the victims of violent crime, Darren speaks passionately about the deep and enduring consequences of losing a twin.
The 57-year-old recollects his horror when he first visited David in hospital after he had been shot. “He went for an eye exam, and when I heard him coming back up the corridor, it went quiet. I could see his hand feeling the doorway. I broke down, realising he’d lost his sight.”
Raoul Moat: Inside the Mind of a Killer, can be streamed on Prime Video from Sunday (Image: )
Darren, who recounts his memories of his brother in a powerful new documentary, Raoul Moat: Inside the Mind of a Killer, which launches on Prime Video tomorrow (Sunday), continues: “I looked at him and thought, ‘Oh God, he’s broken’. That’s when I realised my big brother was in trouble.”
Coming out of hospital after three weeks, David channelled his energy into setting up a charity, The Blue Lamp Foundation, in aid of injured emergency service workers. Darren proudly recalls: “David raised thousands of pounds for injured service personnel. It drove David and he was busy. While you’re busy, you’re not thinking about where you should be, what you’ve lost, what you want. Very shortly after, he started training for the marathon in his garage on a treadmill. He ran a marathon blind. He then won a Pride of Britain award. He had a purpose, and that went on for some time.”
The media circus soon moved on, though, and David was left on his own to contemplate the bitter reality of his life-changing injuries. Darren says: “With that change came the realisation that blackness was going to stay black.”
David, who was married with two children, rapidly spiralled downwards. “He had nightmares,” Darren says. “He had visions. He had all the symptoms of somebody suffering PTSD. Anxiety, shortness of breath, increased heart rate. He said he had visits from him [Moat]. It was that realisation he wouldn’t be able to get sleep again. When David was shot, hundreds of pieces of shrapnel stayed in his face. He was in constant pain.”
From there, David’s spirits only deteriorated. His injuries forced him to leave the police. Then he separated from his wife and she refused his offer of a reconciliation.
On February 24, 2012, David wrote on Twitter: “Mrs R said no to getting back. Disaster. So job lost, eyes lost, family lost, wife and marriage lost. What a year.”
Five days later, he was dead.
With great sadness, Darren remembers their final meeting. “The last time I saw my brother was in my garage. Before he drives off, he tells me what he needs me to do to look after his kids. I say, ‘I don’t need this conversation’, and he replies, ‘Nothing’s going to happen to me.’
“When he drives off, he tells me that he loves me, and I tell him he is the best big brother anybody could have.
“And his reply was, ‘I love you, Darren. You are also the best brother’.”
More than a decade later, Darren remains lost in admiration for David. “My brother is an inspiration not only to me, but he should be an inspiration to everybody. I wanted to be just like him.
“I’m not who I was before. The sun’s in my face, but when I look behind, there’s no shadow. I’m missing something. I think the testament to my brother is 15 years on, people still remember his generosity, his empathy and compassion.”
Darren adds: “Then you look at how people deal with their pain. The perpetrator came out of prison, decided to go and shoot people.
“David got shot and decided to run a charity. Surely, we all have a moral compass that tells us what’s right and wrong.
“And David’s remained pointing in the right direction.”
● Raoul Moat: Inside the Mind of a Killer streams on Prime Video from today