A warning to pasty pinups desperate for a tan: the grass isn’t always greener on the other side.
Envious of folks with naturally golden hues, mom BobbieJo Houston, 39, decided to bronze her bod with a bizarre blend of at home tanning creams.
But instead of sun-kissed, she came out like Shrek.
“Everything’s gone completely wrong — I’m getting greener by the hour,” howled Houston, from the UK, revealed her avocado-colored face to over one million astonished TikTok watchers.
The brunette had admittedly layered her skin in a slew of self-tanning goops from beauty lines such as Bondi Sands, St. Moriz, St. Tropez tanning drops and Molly-mae filter tan, hoping to achieve a chocolatey look.
“I’m praying that [when I wash it off] it’s not a tinge of green still,” said a shook Houston after leaving the mix of cosmetics on her mug overnight. “I’m cocky green.”
Unfortunately, her would-be dream tan turned into a dark nightmare.
“I am getting scared,” said Houston after waking up with an even more emerald tint. In a clip with over 5.3 million views, she tries scrubbing the faux film off of her face, but the gunk had already given her a Grinch-like look.
“I didn’t think this would happen,” the millennial mama whined, adding she’d planned to treat her 19-year-old daughter, Bella, to a posh outing later that afternoon.
“I wouldn’t have left it on this long,” she said, “not when I’ve got somewhere to go.”
Virtual vultures teased the panicked pickle for her seemingly vain stunt.
Haters even likened Houston to “Friends” star David Schwimmer’s “Ross,” who accidentally adopted a burnt-rust shade after two ill-fated spray tans.
“It’s giving Ross Geller vibes,” joked a jabber.
“This is why I don’t fake tan. I rather be pale,” an equally tickled troll quipped.
“That’s a penny if I’ve ever seen one,” wrote another commentator, comparing Houston coppery tone to a coin.
But she’s not the only brownish wannabe whose taste for tanned skin left them burned.
Savannah Grace, 20, a nursing assistant from Georgia, was recently accused of blackface — a cruel mischaracterization of black people made by white people wearing charcoal makeup — due to her fierce affinity for fake melanin.
And Edith Eagle, a 47-year-old stepmother of four, was “minutes away from death” after using $32 nasal spray tanner, Melanotan, known as the TikTok-viral “Barbie Drug,” to deepen her derma.
“I could’ve died that day,” said Eagle, a chef and wedding venue owner from the UK. “I will never again buy anything like this again — especially from the internet.”
Luckily, Houston’s skin-dyeing debacle was no life or death matter.
In fact, the fast-thinking fox was able to wash her face nearly back to normal before hitting the town with her teen.
“It’s actually okay,” she assured online audiences in an update post. “I can get all dressed up…and I’m not going to be green.”
A cheery, and mostly healed, Houston told Caters News, “I shocked the full of TikTok by fixing my error on my face and managing to go perfectly tanned!”
