Don’t test Sir Charles on Halloween.
While on “Inside the NBA” Wednesday evening, panelist Charles Barkley revealed some of his gripes with the holiday, mainly dealing with some greedy trick-or-treaters.
“You damn brats gotta quit bringing basketball cards and stuff to my damn house,” Barkley ranted on the ESPN broadcast. “I’m giving you free damn candy — I’m not there to sign autographs all night. I’m gonna let y’all get away with that this one damn time now.”
Barkley then clarified that although he loves handing out candy, handing him cards to autograph makes him want to “punch them in the face.”
“I love being home to give the kids candy. I love that,” Barkley insisted. “But now they’re bringing cards. And you can’t be mean to kids. I wanted to punch them in the face, but I couldn’t do it. Come on, man.
“Quit bringing damn cards to my house. I’m giving you damn free candy — that’s what Halloween is for.”
Barkley’s comments, like the majority of his “Inside the NBA” rants, drew lots of laughs from the panel.
His lighthearted banter Wednesday came as a stark contrast to last week, when co-host Ernie Johnson announced his retirement from the show after 37 years with the program.
During the show last Wednesday, Barkley paid a teary-eyed tribute to Johnson, 70, following the news.
“That was tough,” Barkley said. “We knew the day was coming. Still tough. Been here for 26, 27 years, and it’s been an honor and a privilege to work with you all this time, and Kenny [Smith] and Shaq [Shaquille O’Neal], and the amazing people behind the scenes. Nothing like it to be able to dribble a stupid basketball and get rich and famous, and then come here and get paid to watch the best players in the world. … You get paid to do it. We’d watch anyway. And so many people at, you know, Turner, WBD, and now, I guess, we Skydance. But it’s been an amazing journey. You’ve been our leader — our unquestionable leader.
“The question I’m asked the most, I’m not gonna lie, most of the time I’m like, ‘Where’s Shaq?’ and ‘Where’s Kenny Smith?’ Like I keep them in my damn back pocket. But the question I’m probably asked the most is, ‘Is Ernie Johnson as good a person as he seems?’ And I say, ‘Man, he’s better than that.’
“So, I just want to say thank you. Thank you for being our leader for all these years.”
Barkley has been on “Inside the NBA” since, funnily enough, Oct. 31, 2000.
