Sir Keir Starmer had been an MP for just a year when David Cameron offered Jeremy Corbyn that now-famous piece of motherly advice: “Put on a proper suit, do up your tie, and sing the national anthem.” At the time, Starmer was a political novice, a North London left-wing lawyer, newly elected and learning the ropes under Corbyn, his constituency neighbour and ideological ally. He served faithfully as Shadow Immigration Minister and then Shadow Brexit Secretary. Their politics were aligned.
During his leadership campaign, Starmer even referred to Corbyn as “my friend”, a phrase that’s aged poorly given how quickly he distanced himself once ambition took hold. In his quest for political respectability and power, Starmer threw his old mentor under the bus.
Fast forward to today, and Starmer has become the man Cameron’s mother could approve of.
He’s taken the advice to heart and run with it. He wears the suit. He sings the anthem. He wraps himself in the flag and performs a pantomime of patriotism. But beneath the costume, little has changed.
This is Jeremy Corbyn rebranded: more polished, more cautious, but driven by the same ideological instincts.
This week’s Strategic Defence Review is a case in point. No bold thinking, no serious new investment, just a rehash of Conservative programmes, relabelled and repackaged to look like something new.
Promises to improve housing for military families sound good, but they’re not backed by new funding or fresh ideas.
Meanwhile, Northern Ireland veterans are left vulnerable to prosecution for their service, even as former terrorists face less scrutiny. A betrayal dressed in red, white, and blue.
Then there’s the Chagos Islands deal. Billions of pounds in taxpayers’ money handed over, British sovereignty quietly surrendered.
The world is watching, and Britain’s adversaries won’t be fooled. They know exactly who’s in charge: Corbyn in a suit, with a better tailor, and better PR.
And now the real agenda begins to show. A quiet war is being waged, not with slogans, but with policy.
The targets are familiar: pensioners, farmers, small business owners, the self-employed, and the families who make sacrific es to send their children to private schools.
One by one, they’re being ticked off the hitlist. A tax here. A reform there. Rhetoric softened, but the intent is clear. It’s redistribution and retribution in a smarter suit.
This is the kind of transformation the original Corbyn, scruffy, blunt, unelectable, could only dream of.
Starmer is doing what Corbyn never could: putting the same ideology into action, but cloaking it in patriotism, pragmatism, and polished soundbites.
The suit fits. The anthem plays. But the agenda underneath hasn’t changed, and voters would do well to look past the costume.