TALK OF THE TOWN: Why Meghan struggles to know her place in Prince Harry's dinner party circuit 

TALK OF THE TOWN: Why Meghan struggles to know her place in Prince Harry's dinner party circuit 


She’s certainly nobody’s fool but I hear the Duchess of Sussex has found it hard to get her head around society seating plans.

There are three rules about what is known as placement

The first is one must always pronounce it in the French way, emphasising all three syllables to avoid sounding ‘common’ or, God forbid, American. 

She's certainly nobody¿s fool but I hear the Duchess of Sussex has found it hard to get her head around society seating plans. The Duchess has been insisting on sitting next to her Prize Prince ever since, rejoicing in those affectionate dinner-table PDAs

She’s certainly nobody’s fool but I hear the Duchess of Sussex has found it hard to get her head around society seating plans. The Duchess has been insisting on sitting next to her Prize Prince ever since, rejoicing in those affectionate dinner-table PDAs

Secondly, couples should never be put together to avoid a public display of affection putting guests off their food. 

And finally, so as not to disrupt the intricate social balancing act that is placement, one must always sit where placed. 

The clue, after all, is in the name. 

So imagine the horror when Meghan first burst into Prince Harry’s dinner party circuit and dismissed the etiquette as ‘exclusive’ and ‘traditional’ (terms that it should be noted are rarely used disparagingly in Royal circles).

Kinder members of society roll their eyes and whisper that the poor lamb can¿t help being Américaine. The less forgiving have just stopped inviting her to dinner

Kinder members of society roll their eyes and whisper that the poor lamb can’t help being Américaine. The less forgiving have just stopped inviting her to dinner

The Duchess has been insisting on sitting next to her Prize Prince ever since, rejoicing in those affectionate dinner-table PDAs. 

Kinder members of society roll their eyes and whisper that the poor lamb can’t help being Américaine. 

The less forgiving have just stopped inviting her to dinner.

Finally someone has found a way to beat the ‘Strictly Curse’… 

Sophie Habboo has dumped boyfriend Jamie Laing before he even makes his first appearance on the BBC show. 

I’m told that as soon as Sophie, 25, knew fellow Made In Chelsea personality Jamie had been chosen to appear on Strictly Come Dancing, she gave him the elbow, claiming lothario Laing, 30, struggles with monogamy at the best of times, let alone while he’s dancing the tango with a beautiful woman.

CELEBS SPOUTING NONSENSE 

Having met Rosie Huntington-Whiteley a few times over the years, I can tell you she isn’t exactly laid-back. 

In fact, I’d describe her as rather irritable and just a tad controlling. 

But after moving to Los Angeles, Rosie has managed to convince herself that this is entirely a good thing.

Having met Rosie Huntington-Whiteley a few times over the years, I can tell you she isn¿t exactly laid-back. In fact, I¿d describe her as rather irritable and just a tad controlling

Having met Rosie Huntington-Whiteley a few times over the years, I can tell you she isn’t exactly laid-back. In fact, I’d describe her as rather irritable and just a tad controlling

‘Someone asked me if I would consider myself a control freak, as if it had a negative connotation,’ Rosie, 32, says. 

‘I really want to remove that stigma from somebody who’s in control of their life, or a micro-manager.’ 

If you say so, Rosie.

MR OBNOXIOUS: CHARLIE BOOKER

When I chatted to TV’s Black Mirror creator Charlie Brooker, 48, at a children’s book launch last week, he managed to regulate his potty mouth… until I strayed into politics. 

‘Boris Johnson is a c***,’ Charlie, right, boomed within earshot of dozens of kids, including two of his. 

‘He should step down, call an Election and f*** off!’ 

When I chatted to TV¿s Black Mirror creator Charlie Brooker, 48, at a children¿s book launch last week, he managed to regulate his potty mouth¿ until I strayed into politics

When I chatted to TV’s Black Mirror creator Charlie Brooker, 48, at a children’s book launch last week, he managed to regulate his potty mouth… until I strayed into politics

The tome in question, by his TV presenter wife Konnie Huq, 44, is called Cookie And The Most Annoying Boy In The World. 

I wonder who inspired it? 

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