I live in ‘UK’s 4th worst seaside resort’ and 3 things have enraged me | UK | Travel

When Which? published its annual list of the best seaside resorts in the country I couldn’t wait to see if my home city made the cut. And that proved the case – but for all the wrong reasons.

To my horror, I found my beloved Southend-on-Sea had been ranked as the fourth-worst resort in the entire country, just above Essex neighbour Clacton-on-Sea, with Bangor and Bognor Regis bringing up the rear. The so-called experts at Which? gave the destination a measly 43% score. And the breakdown of ratings that led to that score are even more savage.

One star out of five was given to the beaches, scenery, peace and quiet and value for money. The seafront/pier, shopping, parking and tourist attractions didn’t fare much better with two stars out of five. Food and drink in the city was the only element to reach sky-high ratings of… three out of five.

So I’m here to explain why this is in total nonsense. I could rattle off dozens of reasons –  including how it’s the driest place in the country – but I’ve narrowed it down to three that, to be frank, have left me fuming they’ve not bumped up the score.

1) The pier

No defence of Southend can start without its most famous attraction – the pier. Which? evidently decided it was worse than average with its two star rating. But there’s a pretty simple reason that is total rubbish – there is factually no other pier in the entire world like it.

Southend Pier has a Guinness World Record for being the longest pleasure pier in the world. Visitors can walk 1.33 miles out into the Thames Estuary and be rewarded with a beautiful panoramic view of the Essex coastline. If you’re lucky, you can even seen seals and dolphins swimming around the pylons holding up the impressive structure.

For those less able (or who just can’t be bothered), a 134-year-old train track still operates, with carriages recently being updated. At the end of the pier, you can wolf down some much-deserved food at the Offshore Restaurant, or Tea with the Tide tearoom. There’s also museums, beach huts, gift shops and bars.

I won’t lie and say there couldn’t be more to enjoy after a 1.3 mile walk (amusements like those on Brighton Pier wouldn’t go amiss). But for this record-holding 136-year-old pier to only get two stars is, quite frankly, scandalous.

2) Leigh-on-Sea

Another crown in Southend’s jewel that Which? whizzes seem to have overlooked is Leigh-on-Sea. The neighbourhood is undoubtedly one of the most desirable areas in the city, if not the county. Southenders flock there every weekend for brunch and coffee in one of the 24 cafes on the Broadway.

Independent shops are dotted throughout for those who fancy some retail therapy. There’s even a Michelin-recommended restaurant to enjoy (named ‘Food’, for those who fancy it) while bars and pubs come alive at night.

Taking just 45 minutes to get into London by train, it’s perhaps no surprise average house prices sit at £442,510 – nearly £200,000 above the national average. I love taking a short 20-minute walk down from the Broadway, over the railway and into Old Leigh.

Situated right on the seafront, the former fishing village has a beautiful cobbled street running through it lined with clapboard houses from the 18th Century. Shacks are always open selling countless varieties of fresh fish – including prawns, oysters and mussels caught that day.

And the meal can be washed down with a pint at the ever-popular Peterboat or the Boatyard, which overlook the fishing trawlers bobbing in the estuary. Ye Olde Smack is always a popular pub for locals too.

3) The beaches and seafront

Finally, we have the pièce de résistance in Southend’s empire – its seafront. Which?’s one star rating suggests visitors will be greeted by an apocalyptic wasteland where the sea is filled with waste and mounds of rubbish cover any trace of sand.

But, I assure you, that couldn’t be further from the truth. All eight of Southend’s beaches, stretched across seven miles of coastline, have won awards.

East Beach, Shoebury Common and Three Shells have a combined Blue Flag and Seaside Award. Meanwhile, Chalkwell Beach, Jubilee Beach, Leigh Bell Wharf, Thorpe Bay and Westcliff have received Seaside Awards.

That means they have been recognised for the high standards of water quality, cleanliness and facilities. Doesn’t sound much like a 1/5 rating does it?

The beaches themselves, I’ll concede, are stony and so five stars may be a stretch. But they definitely deserve more than one. 

No trip to the seafront is complete without a tasty ice cream to cool you down. And I’ll put my neck out by saying Southend boasts one of the best, and most recognisable ice cream brands in the country – Rossi’s Ice Cream.

Most beachfront kiosks sell it and their flagship cafe near Westcliff Beach boasts practically every flavour of delicious ice cream you can think of.

Nearby, a collection of cafes and restaurants known as the Arches – formed inside former boat houses – mean you can grab a hearty lunch while overlooking the water.

Beach huts in Thorpe Bay, meanwhile, are in high demand. One recently went on sale can for £120,000 – believed to be one of the two most expensive huts currently on the market in the whole of England.

So, here’s to next year’s list. I hope to goodness Southend gets a higher spot like it deserves. If it doesn’t, well, ignore it…