A man has been left heartbroken after a mum asked him to move away from her child on a plane because ‘his face was making him cry’.
The 24-year-old explained how he underwent a procedure called an orbital exenteration after developing an aggressive cancer – and it left him with a “pool-ball sized” hole where his right eye used to be.
He has opted to leave the hole as is rather than cover it up with a patch or prostatic while he comes to terms with “missing part of his upper face”.
The man said on Reddit: “In this flight I picked a window seat like I always and settle in, and not long after a woman boards with her husband and her son who’s around 4/5 years old. Her husband has a seat in the row behind me and she and her son have the middle and aisle seats in my row.
“The moment her son saw me, he visibly recoils. I’m quite used to occasional glances and stares, and it doesn’t bother me, but whenever I notice children looking scared of me, that always kind of hurts. I know kids don’t have filters, I understand, but I was expecting his mother to just tell him to knock it off or something.”
But rather than apologise for her child’s reaction and try to explain things to him, she asked him to move seats so her child wouldn’t have to look at him on the flight.
She asked me “can you switch seats with my husband? My son’s not exactly the most comfortable sitting next to you, I apologise. He’s kind of scared here so it would really help us out”.
The man explained: “I told her that no, I wouldn’t change seats because I wanted my window seat to which she asked me a few more times before giving up and saying something along the lines of ‘Seriously? He’s only a child, I just thought you might a little more sensitive’.”
The entire situation was a huge blow to his already low confidence, with him adding: “I am sensitive, I’ve been sensitive about my face since the day I got surgery, I’ve avoided photos, mirrors, and public settings all too often. But apparently I’m not sensitive enough for choosing my own comfort over a random child’s.
“To be honest, for a while after that I had to hold in tears because my disfigurement embarrasses me, and often times I’m so embarrassed I don’t go out much, and this reminded me exactly why.
“I understand a child is a child and people will stare, but I just hate how she treated me as if I was doing something wrong by just existing.”
Commenting on his post, one user said: “Young man, I’m a 64-year-old grandmother, and I want you to listen to me. Put down anything you have in your hands and feel the hug I am sending you. Relax into it.
“I understand your feelings. You’ve had a major surgery at such a young age. You’re fighting cancer! You deserve all the love and grace and empathy that exists in the world.
“I hope you have a full recovery. I am sure you will go on to live a life of wonder and excitement and friendship and love.
“There are awful people in this world. Sometimes, we have to share space with them. When people say something awful to me, I say some variation of this phrase: Does that make you feel better about yourself?”
Another user added: “Firstly I am so sorry about your cancer and I sincerely hope they got it all and you kick cancers a**.
“Secondly they had no right to ask that of you, that was a teaching moment for her and the child and should have had nothing to do with you at all.
“I wish you a speedy recovery both physically and mentally and I hope you find the love for yourself that you once that because you are perfect and loved no matter what you look like.”