I once ghosted a guy I was seeing because he was giving me too many compliments.
I’ve also dumped a boyfriend on account of the fact he was “too good” for me.
Rex Features Eyal has ended up coupling with Megan instead of ‘nice guy’ Alex
And in college, I shunned a handsome friend who wanted to date me because he was, for lack of a better term, kind of boring.
These men all had something in common: they were incredibly nice guys – the kind of boys you know will say all the right things when you bring them home to meet your parents, will never forget a significant date, and wouldn’t dream of treating you as anything less than the princess you are.
And there’s just one problem with this breed of men; they’re usually duds in the sack.
One only has to look at what happened to Love Island’s resident “nice guy” Alex – who finished last to bad boy Eyal last night in a spectacularly disappointing, but in no way shocking showdown – for proof.
Rex Features Hayley chatted to Alex before she made her decision to couple with Eyal
Nice guys finish last
Is Eyal husband material? I’m going to go with a hard pass.
Let’s face it, the guy’s biggest life achievement is being part of a bad pop band half a decade ago. Meanwhile, Alex is an actual doctor. A DOCTOR!
But, seriously, who cares about what a guy’s credentials are when he’ll swoop in and snog you in public, mid-flirt, meanwhile asserting his dominance over the beta male in the room?! (Was it just me, or did every other woman’s screen steam over during that scene?)
Here’s the thing no one’s comfortable talking about when it comes to why “lovely” Alex is failing miserably on Love Island: Alex is a wonderful guy, but he is also, quite simply, a wimp.
Alex is a guy who sees what he wants, and then sheepishly dances around it until maybe it finally one day makes eye contact with him.
Now Eyal, devastatingly 90s hairstyled Eyal…he is a guy who sees what he wants, and goes for it, full tongue. And quite frankly, that’s hot as hell.
ITV New girl Hayley then decided to go for Eyal and not couple up with nice guy Alex
ITV2 Hayley and Eyal get cosy in the villa
Equality for all. Except in the bedroom.
I’m a feminist. I don’t just believe in equality, I demand it – from men I’m friends with, men I date, and men in my workplace.
But one place I definitely don’t want to be treated as an equal is in the bedroom. When I’m having sex, I want a man who’ll take charge, talk dirty, and make me feel a little slutty (in a totally consensual way, of course).
Is he likely to love me and leave me within moments of finishing, via some form of lame excuse like “Well, I really should get going, I’ve got a lot of laundry to do today”? Probably.
Will I feel slightly grossed out at myself for letting myself be treated like some kind of sex doll? Maybe.
But can I be pretty much guaranteed to have face-meltingly hot sex in the process – the kind that would make E.L James proud? Absolutely.
Because if there’s one thing cocky bad boys like Eyal are good at, it’s getting us off. Which is why, in spite of our better judgement, the potential for a sexy romp with a guy we know will likely screw us over at some point will always trump a “nice” date with a “good guy” like Alex.
So while I know I should give the underdog a chance for his undying dedication to chivalry and ability to impress old people everywhere, if given the choice, I’m going to have to opt for a hot romp with an emotionally unavailable and possibly intellectually vacant hottie instead.
Look, it’s not my proudest confession, but I’m still young, after all. I’ve got plenty of time to mature and do the “nice”, sensible thing when I’m older. Like, maybe 90.
See more from sexpert Nadia on her Instagram @nadiabokody